The friendslist frequently does not register people online who ARE actually online; you only find out if you try to send an IM, or when they go offline (at which point it tells you). Sometimes, exchanging IMs will make the person pop up 'online', sometimes you can happily exchange a long conversation in IM without that person ever appearing 'online'. This is NOT with people who have chosen to hide their online status, it is with normal friends. Relogging can help to refresh the friendslist; alternatively, relogging can sometimes break it further.
PLEASE stop marking the bug reports on this issue as RESOLVED, they are not resolved at all.
Additionally, today (Sunday 08 April) at approximately 2:15pm PDT I was forced to relog after a crash, my flist was completely empty, so I sent some IM's out to a few people I had been talking to only moments before and knew were online, also sent out a group IM to my own group which includes some of those people. An absolute failure to receive any response convinced me that my IMs were not functioning at all, since people are usually quick to respond, so I relogged a second time. On login, I received their replies (delayed and saved). The group IM didn't let me talk at all but that's a pretty usual state of affairs these days 
This was immediately following a re-occurrance of bug https://jira.secondlife.com/browse/VWR-1043
for which I have added a further comment.
I am running version 1:17:0 (have not taken any of the optional updates).