[#VWR-13114] Add Preference to Auto-Deny friend requests with "busy-message" like response to the user

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Add Preference to Auto-Deny friend requests with "busy-message" like response to the user

Created: 30/Apr/09 10:51 PM Updated: 01/May/09 10:38 AM

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This issue Relates to:

~~VWR-4826~~ Add an "Ignore" button to friendship requests to keep online status private

SVC-241 Meta-issue: Improved In-world Privacy

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Many people work in SL in a business level. Often, we have to say in our profiles "Sorry but I don't accept friend requests", and yet often people don't read our profiles (or ignore them), and send uninvited friend requests anyway, at which point we have to find some polite way to say, "No thanks" all over again, and risk upsetting them – which is always awkward.

If you're set to busy, friend requests are already automatically denied and they are sent a message, but obviously we don't want to go around being "Busy" all the time. The same kind of code, however, could be put into an additional option set specifically to target friend requests, with its own message. That allows us an impersonal, automatic way to deny friend requests so that people don't feel it's "just them". If they press, then we can explain that for business reasons we don't accept them, but it'd be easier in the long run if it were automatic and we never had to deal with it in the first place, since that would catch most of those who just didn't read the profile message. Did I mention it would save us from using space in our profile to say we don't accept friend requests that could be better used in other ways? Like saying, "I like pizza!"

If we do run a business in SL, we want to use our profile to promote ourselves and our work, not to state a mostly unread message that we're nasty, unfriendly people who don't accept friend requests and eat you if you try (catch my drift? Hehe). Because we try to save space for just that, our messages concerning friend requests are often short, terse, and can come across as unfriendly. If we had this option, we could expand that message to be much more amiable and "friendly" in appearance.

The preference would fit best I think in the "Communication" tab, near where the busy message editing box appears.

Description

I would like to propose the introduction of an option in preferences which allows the user to auto-deny friend requests, along with a customizeable message (just as how the busy message works) that is sent to the user requesting the friendship. Many people work in SL in a business level. Often, we have to say in our profiles "Sorry but I don't accept friend requests", and yet often people don't read our profiles (or ignore them), and send uninvited friend requests anyway, at which point we have to find some polite way to say, "No thanks" all over again, and risk upsetting them – which is always awkward. If you're set to busy, friend requests are already automatically denied and they are sent a message, but obviously we don't want to go around being "Busy" all the time. The same kind of code, however, could be put into an additional option set specifically to target friend requests, with its own message. That allows us an impersonal, automatic way to deny friend requests so that people don't feel it's "just them". If they press, then we can explain that for business reasons we don't accept them, but it'd be easier in the long run if it were automatic and we never had to deal with it in the first place, since that would catch most of those who just didn't read the profile message. Did I mention it would save us from using space in our profile to say we don't accept friend requests that could be better used in other ways? Like saying, "I like pizza!"

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Stickman Ingmann added a comment - 01/May/09 02:30 AM

While we're at it, why not renamed "friends list" to something else? Contacts list? People list? Denying someone a "friend" request is mean. Denying someone a "contact list" request seems a lot less personal.

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Soft Linden added a comment - 01/May/09 06:03 AM

@stickman - that sounds like a wise idea. I'd make a separate JIRA for that if there isn't one already. It's more likely to get voted on and picked up that way.

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Soft Linden added a comment - 01/May/09 06:06 AM

Should an auto-reject option like this have any kind of eceptions? For example, should nearby people still be allowed to issue a request?

What should happen if two people with this option set decide that they would like to be friends? I'm confident that Rx would deem having to go into preferences to temporarily disable the feature as unacceptable.

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Brandon Shinobu added a comment - 01/May/09 10:36 AM - edited

My apologies for the double edit to those watching this topic

Actually, most of the times the auto-denial would be useful is when I am in close proximity. In most cases, you're standing or walking around somewhere and a person decides for whatever random reason, to right-click and friend. I may even be talking to them, trying to fix a script or a build, and they offer a friend invite, but it usually isn't appropriate because I don't really know them well anyway, and I'm there for business, not to say hi to them every time I log on (which is inevitably what they end up wanting or trying to do themselves). This wouldn't bother me so much if I had a way to sort my friend list/"contact list" (I like that idea too), but I don't, and I'm afraid of using the "appear offline" option for fear that they will find out and call foul, since I'm in the same places at the same times frequently, and they would know where to find me.

In the case you mentioned, perhaps it could be a checkbox on the communications tab, and the message delivered as an auto-response would be defined in the preferences? That would make it easy to turn it on and off when needed, without cluttering up the interface. Another option could be having it in the world drop-down menu, just as "Set Away" and "Set Busy" are, and even included in the same group. It would just be important in that case, that the toggle persist over client sessions (I don't think someone wants to have to turn it on every time they log in, either.

I can really only think of one situation where there might be an exception, and to be honest, it seems like this situation would be unnecessarily difficult to code anyway, but: Let's say that you could right-click someone, and in the pie menu have an option to "allow requests", and from then on, that option on the pie menu would change to "deny requests" (if you should for some reason change your mind when they put on a hoola skirt and start dancing on your head). But until "Deny friend requests" was hit, they would be able to bypass the auto-denial and offer friendship.

Like I said, that seems nice, but it also seems like it'd be a complex thing to code, and I thnk at least for the short term, we'd be better off with an easily accessible means of toggling it on and off like a checkbox in the communications or friend's list tab or from the world menu. If you want, perhaps you could add in an option in preferences where the message would be defined to allow people toggling whether or not friend requests near them would be allowed through, for those frequently in situtations where they would want that to be possible and don't want to have to toggle it on an off all the time. But, definitely, my opinion would be that it should be a toggle if it's part of the mechanics.

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Brandon Shinobu added a comment - 01/May/09 10:36 AM - edited My apologies for the double edit to those watching this topic Actually, most of the times the auto-denial would be useful is when I am in close proximity. In most cases, you're standing or walking around somewhere and a person decides for whatever random reason, to right-click and friend. I may even be talking to them, trying to fix a script or a build, and they offer a friend invite, but it usually isn't appropriate because I don't really know them well anyway, and I'm there for business, not to say hi to them every time I log on (which is inevitably what they end up wanting or trying to do themselves). This wouldn't bother me so much if I had a way to sort my friend list/"contact list" (I like that idea too), but I don't, and I'm afraid of using the "appear offline" option for fear that they will find out and call foul, since I'm in the same places at the same times frequently, and they would know where to find me. In the case you mentioned, perhaps it could be a checkbox on the communications tab, and the message delivered as an auto-response would be defined in the preferences? That would make it easy to turn it on and off when needed, without cluttering up the interface. Another option could be having it in the world drop-down menu, just as "Set Away" and "Set Busy" are, and even included in the same group. It would just be important in that case, that the toggle persist over client sessions (I don't think someone wants to have to turn it on every time they log in, either. I can really only think of one situation where there might be an exception, and to be honest, it seems like this situation would be unnecessarily difficult to code anyway, but: Let's say that you could right-click someone, and in the pie menu have an option to "allow requests", and from then on, that option on the pie menu would change to "deny requests" (if you should for some reason change your mind when they put on a hoola skirt and start dancing on your head). But until "Deny friend requests" was hit, they would be able to bypass the auto-denial and offer friendship. Like I said, that seems nice, but it also seems like it'd be a complex thing to code, and I thnk at least for the short term, we'd be better off with an easily accessible means of toggling it on and off like a checkbox in the communications or friend's list tab or from the world menu. If you want, perhaps you could add in an option in preferences where the message would be defined to allow people toggling whether or not friend requests near them would be allowed through, for those frequently in situtations where they would want that to be possible and don't want to have to toggle it on an off all the time. But, definitely, my opinion would be that it should be a toggle if it's part of the mechanics.